Sleep, more needed. updated Jan 23, 6am


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Up and outside at 2:30am, cold. Probably not the best idea.
But....
Have been getting just a few hours a night passed days, not nearly enough in my
condition. Now from about 22:15 to 01:45, and i was sitting on the edge of my bed, just knowing there will be no sleeping anymore the next couple hours. But i seem to have a lot floating around in my brain, i hadn't noticed really.
I need to analyze this.

OK, Let's see whats popping in my head at night, and why.
  1. Immunotherapy gets in here a lot. I have no idea what exactly is on the table for me. But that info i get next Tuesday for the most part. Probably all the research i did on it causes more questions now.
  2. My hair is getting really thin, and starts to come loose. Do i want to do something about it, or just go bald like i said i would?                               Ok, 6:30am, i was just in the bedroom.  Hair everywhere , i'll be bald by tonight.
  3. The estimated time of life with SCLC is one year max i was told at first, does that mean if chemo works well or not, when do i get an updated timeline. And i need one where i am living and doing stuff, when i need to be hooked up to a machine, they don't need to plug it in anyway. I need this information soon, that is eating on me. I want to plan one last vacation with the wife in bearable circumstances, maybe to Spain for a few weeks. And then there is all the rest i need/want to do in that time frame.If chemo makes the tumor smaller or slower, i need to know what it means to me. For all i know now, i was told about my condition, Dec 29, 2018. one year max, so i assumed about until new years day 2020. But if i am a blabbering bald old guy by August, that time frame is wrong!
  4. When will i know what exactly is happening with the part that got to my brain already? Nobody talks about it to me, but seems important no??
  5. Saturday morning dilemma waking me up seems to be my home IT. Who can fix my setup, and my wife's laptop? My hardware will belong to her as well of course, i have no issues maintaining my home network. But i know every wire in this house. 



Hmm, 05:30 already, better decide if i try to get another few hours tonight.
Lets make coffee, mind too busy right now, will not sleep anyway.
To be continued ....

Saturday Morning, sleep 23:00 - 01:45
I seem to have primarily Linux & Android going on up there.
 - will have to get the wife's laptop a new windoze 10 install.
Just when i have her happily using Linux Mint and she doesn't need winblows anymore. And i have her exploring more features in Android.
 - Who is going to fix anything IT in my house when i'm not around?? I can't think of anyone instantly, and someone that knows a Linux terminal? Who capable would be closest, Alex in Toulouse? Others that come in mind are in US or India.
I could setup teamviewer access... But what if no boot or network.
    Volunteers are welcome at this point
 I will have to get her Windows partition updated and running good before i get worse (if that happens already).
    Note to self: Make a list of things IT to-do, this weekend!

Well, thats that, know what to do again. It's 03:20am now, i have coffee. Going to try and get back in bed by 4am to get some more sleep.

Sunday Morning, sleep 21:00 - 00:45
Why am i awake? i don't seem to have anything turning around in my brain.
But i know i will not be sleeping again right away, hmmm, ...cookies is first to pop in there, ok, we can do that. Been losing weight to fast anyway...

Lets do some Android stuff until i get sleepy again...
Got sleepy at 5:15 
 - Round 2: 05:30 - 08:15  yay, that's a nice addition.   
Woke up angry at wife, saw her smoking a cigarette. No, she is still sleeping, was a dream. Ok, calm down, hmm, that was weird. She stopped smoking over a year ago, 2 years i think already, and uses one of my vapes when she feels like it.
Reminds me i keep that going for her now, i need to show her how to do all that.
To-do list gets longer. (still have to start that)

Monday Morning, sleep 22:30 - 02:30
Wake up, look up up to my brain, nothing there. OK, that's a nice change. Take phone to look at time, 02:30, in the screen light i see hair falling down... Hmmm, lets get a closer loser look in the bathroom.

This mornings harvest looks, euhm,..good? What to say really, i'm going to be bald soon i guess. Lets get some coffee. I know there will be no sleeping right away.
Some team members at Ground Zero Rom's said they will join the Bald & bearded club when i decide it's time to take the rest off. I should start taking names and make a list ;)
John Brewer of course is ahead of me and is already there, haha
I still have plenty now, but with next round Chemo starting Wednesday, it could be getting worse. Ok, i'll add a selfie.
Got another little nap 06:30 - 08:00,  still not enough, but i'll take it ;)

Tuesday Morning, sleep 22:30 - 00:30
Uh, thats early. Have to be in hospital by 7am. Hmm, ok, i can have a coffee now then.
Second sleep stage from  04:00 - 05:30 Alarm is going of, need to leave for hospital at 6:30. Riding around my brain is Vape juice flavors i need to order. Good, i don't seem to care about the full narcoses today.

Wednesday Morning, sleep 22:30 - 00:30
This is getting normal, no real reason in my head to be awake. Chemoday, have to be there at 8am. Awake and ready, better get up until i feel i can sleep again. If i stay in bed i start thinking about stuff and won't sleep at all.

Now if it was say, 25 years ago, i would deal with this no sleeping thing easy. Just smoke some pot, done. But i don't smoke anymore i said, of course there is ways to vape it, i haven't really followed that for now.
I wonder what the doctors would say about that idea.
Hmmm...

Round 2 04:00 - 06:00 Brain busy busy with Pete Best, ughh.
He started a fundraising thing to benefit SCLC cancer research and specifically Immunotherapy research in small cell lung cancer. He does that because of my condidition, i need to figure out how i can best help get it noticed. Maybe using this blog, my G+, and other social media.
I am pretty well known in Android custom rom land, although i always tried to stay out of the spotlight. Maybe it can help here anyway.
Some links
Pete's Google+ post
cancerresearchuk.org

Well, better get Chemo ready.....

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